slick

Perfect relationship?

And we haven't been away even for that long but it takes a few days to kick start those batteries again. I will post some Nepal and everest pictures later on but first this: while in Nepal I read about the Polish man who awoke after 20 years of coma. Huh?

It is the stuff of fairytales and happy endings, the story of a Polish railway worker who woke up to a new world of plenty after falling into a "coma" 19 years ago when Poland was still communist. Grzebski was transferred from one hospital to another to undergo treatment until finally his wife opted to bring him home and care for him herself. There may not have been a miracle in Grzebski's revival, but the story of his wife's dedication has struck a chord with diehard romantics. Grzebski is now making the acquaintance of 11 grandchildren. lol..

Grzebski told he has been aware that the days of communism, rationing and interminable queues to get the little that was available in the shops, had long ended in Poland.

But he has still not got over a recent trip to the local supermarket.
"There are no queues. You take what you want and as much of it as you want. You don't need ration tickets like during the communist era," he marvelled.

If it were the Netherlands the poor man would all of a sudden wake up to a country in decay, satellite dishes, burqas, multicultural violence, exploded crime figures and huge taxes to maintain a government that even Kafka didn't foresee. Anyway..

So is this the perfect example of matrimonial loyalty? What does it take to make a marriage work?

I say that within a good relationship you should never let each other down when one or the other has got his or her week moment. You should be faithfull, supportive, loving, respectful and caring. bla bla bla and so on

Now what's your number one ingredient for the perfect marriage or relationship cake?

Wikicopy on marriage:

A marriage is an interpersonal relationship with governmental, social, or religious recognition, usually intimate and sexual, and often created as a contract. The most frequently occurring form of marriage unites a man and a woman as husband and wife.[1][2][citation needed] Other forms of marriage also exist; for example, polygamy, in which a person takes more than one spouse, is common in many societies.[3] Beginning in 2001, the legal concept of marriage has been expanded to include same-sex marriage in some jurisdictions.[4]The reasons people marry vary widely, but usually include one or more of the following: legal, social and economic stability; the formation of a family unit; procreation and the education and nurturing of children; legitimizing sexual relations; public declaration of love.[5][6]A marriage is often declared by a wedding ceremony,[7] which may be performed by a religious officiator, through a similar government-sanctioned secular officiator, or (in weddings that have no church or state affiliation) by a trusted friend of the wedding participants. The act of marriage usually creates obligations between the individuals involved, and in many societies, their extended families.[citation needed]

post ceremonial pics

After the wedding some pictures were taken in the Potala Palace gardens. At night special (wedding?) fireworks lightened up the palace.

Now we are preparing for the real honeymoon which will take us via Mount Everet base camp to Kathmandu. CU later, hope you enjoyed the pictures. Kind regards, Ursula and Dimitri..

Wedding certificate

Scarfs are given for blessings. After the ceremony we received an authentic stamped wedding certificate from the lama of the Drepong monastery. It appeared that we were the first to be given such a paper. I believe we gave them a new business opportunity idea :-)

Now the actual marriage

We entered the main kitchen where the treasurer monk was receiving the donations and changing them into smaller yuan bills so they can be handed over to each of the 300 monks present during the ceremony. Off course we could not refuse the traditional butter tea..and another round..
A pack of Yuans left for the monks that were on duty or not in the house. Drepung monastery houses around 600 monks.

Some Pictures of a Buddhist Wedding part 2

Atop the Jokhang monestary, the most sacred of them all in Tibet. On the right on the Jokhar square in our traditional Tibetan wedding outfit before we went of to Drepong.

Prayer wheels at the Potala Palace

Some Pictures of a Buddhist Wedding part 1

Panda Park in Chengdu, China. Buddhist offering spot in Tibet on the right.

A non-typical honeymoon

My dear friends, thank you for all your kind wishes. Yes I am still alive but quit my job two months ago and c0-started two new private companies and as a writer/editor for a Dutch magazine so had to work very hard to make it happen.

Three days ago we arrived in Lhasa, Tibet where we will get married tomorrow (Deo Volente). As Ursula experienced some severe altitude sickness I did not blog yet and we had to postpone our ceremony until tomorrow. Luckily she recoverd after a few days. Tomorrow I will try to post some pictures that we allready made.

Our hotel is opposite the Jokhang tempel and today is the most sacred day in the year so the Bokhar square is packed with pilgrims that procrastinate.

Back tomorrow, after the wedding I hope :-)

Amsterdam, Sold! For $50,000!

Amsterdam, one of the landmark business in Second life, modeled on the city’s red light district, and specializing in adult content, was sold for $50,000.

The previous owner, whose avatar is called “Stroker Serpentine”, says he sold the iconic virtual destination “to focus on a new, bigger adult business”. Little is known about the city’s new custodian, except that he is — perhaps appropriately — from the Netherlands.

My city is one of the first places that most first-time players visit in Second Life, mostly due to the ‘titillation factor’. It has been the meeting place for members of the Dutch Parliament. It been featured twice on CBS News. It has appeared on numerous multi-media outlets throughout the world. It remains a focal point on the SL landscape.

An excellent investment I say. Every day more than 50,000 cybermen visit this cybertown to see a little cyberbooty. I predict that the cyberbuyer will recoup his cybervestment in less than a month.

by "Dimitri Alexandre"

Too young to die

On the 5th of March, two very beautiful women, Susana and Peronne, were called back to the light way too young. Yesterday we were told that our 22yo niece Martine decided to leave earth as well. May their beautiful souls rest in peace..

We are alive, therefore we will die. This is the simplest, most obvious truth of our existence, and yet it is so hard to come to terms with it. Truly respecting death and its inevitability brings, paradoxically, a relaxing of the fear of death, along with a heightened sense of the importance of life and of what we choose to do with the time we have. So live now and take good care of yourselves and your loved ones...

That time of year thou mayst in me behold
When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang
Upon those boughs which shake against the cold,
Bare ruin'd choirs, where late the sweet birds sang.

In me thou seest the twilight of such day
As after sunset fadeth in the west,
Which by and by black night doth take away,
Death's second self, that seals up all in rest.

In me thou see'st the glowing of such fire
That on the ashes of his youth doth lie,
As the death-bed whereon it must expire
Consumed with that which it was nourish'd by.

This thou perceivest, which makes thy love more strong,
To love that well which thou must leave ere long.

-- Shakespeare --

Slick and his Column

DA007

This week I was asked for a 007-like fotoshoot for a Dutch magazine: here are some results

It was fun to do although they needed to shoot about 600 pics under very warm lights to get a few good results (no America's next top model huh). This magazine asked me to start a column on Dutch network-events, gala's and parties. Who better to aks then the Netherlands biggest alcoholic. (just kidding off course:-)

DA MBA and thoughts on Tibetan marriage

I know, I know, I have been the worst blogger in history of mankind. I am not even trying to apologize anymore. Thing is that there's not enough time in one day. Had to finish my studies, which I did. Had to work like crazy to prevent from drowning in the political arena and had to attend too many new years gala's and parties. Also made a new website for personal business. Click here to have a look if you like. Most of the precious free time however I'd rather spend with my loved ones then sitting behind the desk I have noticed. And that's a good sign as far as I'm concerned.

These days we are also preparing our Tibetan wedding. We have decided to get married in Lhasa by means of a Buddhist ceremony and then travel through Tibet and Nepal somewhere in May.

Siddhartha (later known as the Buddha), was married and had a family and so in this respect it is quite natural for Buddhists to marry and have children. In fact, in the Mahamangala Sutra the Buddha spoke of many aspects of family life as those things which would lead to happiness and blessings:

• Supporting one’s father and mother
• Loving one’s wife (or husband) and children
• Being generous and having a sense of duty
• Helping relatives and acting blamelessly
• Reverence, humility, contentment, gratitude and listening to the Dharma

Clearly the idea of duty and support needs to be understood in the context of Indian society where the extended family is quite important and a sense of maintaining traditions a priority. However, it can also be seen that developing these attitudes will also help someone towards achieving Enlightenment as each of them will gradually lead to a person becoming less focused on their own needs and more towards those of others. It is this attitude which will ultimately lead to greater compassion for all living things (for more information on this see An Introduction to Buddhist Ethics (GCSE)).

It is also important to note how marriage and family provide opportunities to apply the The Five Precepts

The Five Precepts

To refrain from killing or harming living things.
To refrain from harming another human includes making sure one's actions do not lead to emotional suffering. In the context of marriage both partners should make sure the other knows how much they are valued. There should be a positive attempt to always express appreciation for the other person. Taking someone for granted is the root of many problems between a husband and wife.

To refrain from taking what is not given.
In this modern age of an increased sense of equality between men and women it is important that duties in the household are shared. It is wrong for men to presume that only women should take care of the family and the home. Assuming such an attitude may take away from time the woman has the right to spend elsewhere (E.g. Meeting friends, hobbies, relaxing, chatting with their partner...).

To refrain from sexual misconduct.
Applied literally this means husbands and wives should not have affairs (see below). However, it could also apply to the quality of their sexual relationship. Sex should be a natural expression of closeness between a husband and wife and should reflect the quality of their whole relationship. A good sex life normally means one has a good relationship. Doing things the partner may not wish to do, or insisting on sex when the other person does not want it, are examples of 'unskillful actions' which can lead to emotional suffering. This is clearly against the first precept. (For more on this see Buddhism and Sexual Ethics.)

To refrain from false and wrong speech.
Marriages should be based on truth. Neither partner should hide anything from the other (unless it is to do with buying a present!). Also, neither partner should be afraid of saying anything to the other. Many marriages fail because one or both partners have been afraid to communicate their true feelings about the other person (or the quality of their relationship). HOWEVER, speaking the truth does not mean being nasty! For a Buddhist, speaking the truth would have to be balanced by the first precept. It is possible to do tremendous psychological and emotional harm to a person simply by what you say to them.

To refrain from drink or drugs which cloud the mind.
For a Buddhist remaining clear minded is important as it keeps them focused and allows them to remain in control of their feelings and emotions. Many affairs have begun due to drunken antics at an office party. Many partners have also been the subject of abusive behaviour at the hands of a drunken spouse.

To our friends